Saturday, June 03, 2006

Who Says You Can't Go Home Again?

A bit of homestead upheaval has thrown off my blogging groove.

I've now been at home for a little more than two weeks. In that time, I've researched, relaxed, cleaned, relaxed, packed, relaxed, unpacked, relaxed... I've also, apparently, been getting in the way of my family's established homelife. I guess I can understand. For months, my parents and little brother have been going through life without me, then suddenly, there is a twenty year old lump in the house.

I have an over-blown sense of entitlement, I suppose. It's not that I want anything out of my family; I just kind of want to sit and let the activity flow around me. I've been at the center of so many disputes and effort in the last couple of months, so I just want to shut down. Luckily, I have been very adept at letting my body veg on the couch and allowing my mind to go somewhere else.

Unfortunately, my parents have a different plan for me. To them, there are now three adults in the house, so there will be three adults doing three adults' worth of work. So we have two conflicting goals.

I think I've forgotten how to live with a family and that lack of knowledge is showing more and more everyday as I steadily become more exasperated. All the little niceties of a well-run home have become quite foreign to me. I'm now used to living with my own requirements, by my own rules. However, that's not how things work anymore. I'll just have to get used to it.

As a peace offering, I traveled with my mother to Boiling Springs to meander through a craft fair. Afterwards, I made some badly-formed cheese blintzes with my father. I guess I just need to survive until I leave for camp.

Just keep thinking happy thoughts, Kate, happy thoughts...


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