Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Ani Lo Mehveena Evrit. Boo.

I was watching BBC America today and realized that I was terribly behind on one of my resolutions.

"Coupling" was on and one of the terribly inept guys was trying to pull a gorgeous girl at the bar. Typically, he was tripping over his tongue, telling her that he collects women's ears in an "ear bucket," ultimately making a fool of himself. She sits there silently, then says this:

"Blah blah blah blah slicha."

My first reaction: "Oh, she doesn't speak English."

My second reaction: "Wait, did she say 'slicha'?"

My final reaction: "Holy crap, that's Hebrew. And all I understood was 'excuse me'."

Yep, she was Israeli. And yep, I've been failing miserably in my quest to become conversational in Hebrew by the summer.

Granted, later on, I caught "Ani lo mehveena" (I don't understand), "Ani yoda'at." (I know), and a couple other phrases. And I did figure out that she entirely misunderstood the conversation. And I did find the humor of the guy running up and down the El Al terminal yelling "Shadai'im! Shadai'im!*" But I didn't get nearly enough of the conversation that I should have.

My father, on the other hand, is busy learning the ninth unit of the Pimsleur lessons. He told me that the couple is having some relationship troubles (I knew there was a story there), but won't let me in on the details. I just have to learn them for myself.

I've been taking 18 credits, with three of those credits including a load of 12 textbooks. My eyelids can barely stay open for two minutes. I just can't sit a listen to those two people natter on and on with the random interruptions by the English instructor.

Oh well, I guess I just have to soldier on.



PS. I can't spell transliterated Hebrew. Sorry.

*"Breasts! Breasts!" He thought that was her name. Aha hah.


  1. see, growing up catholic not only allows me a misguided superiority complex, but also secures the fact that i will NEVER need to learn Hebrew.

  2. just me: We Jews have the superiority complex and the need for Hebrew (sometimes). But there is something we both share-- the guilt. That sweet, sweet guilt.