Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Elections and Passover: The Kvetch Begins

Trying to figure out how to pimp my banner is giving me a headache and keeping me from studying for my biology test tomorrow.

However, as I am who I am, I cannot resist a chance to complain. There are just so many things to kvetch about, but I'll limit myself to two.

1. WCU SGA Elections

For several weeks, the Student Government Association has been gearing up for its executive board elections. While it's exciting to see democracy in action on one's own campus, having to deal with self-righteous student politicians (which I would argue are almost more evil than professional politicians, but that's another post for another time) shoving their platforms in one's face every day.

Things have been picking up more steam now that the actual election week is upon us, so the sucking-up to the student body has been increasing steadily. Both tickets have taken to stopping people on the way to classes in order to sell their spiel on how they are so different from the other ticket and blah blah blah.

Candidate: HI THERE! HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT WHO YOU'RE GOING TO VOTE FOR IN THE SGA ELECTIONS?!

Student: Uhmmm, no. Can this wait? I have class.

Candidate: WAIT? WAIT?! THIS IS YOUR FUTURE WE'RE TALKING ABOUT! DON'T YOU WANT TO DECIDE WHO WILL BE REPRESENTING YOU NEXT YEAR?!

Student: But... I'm graduating at the end of the semester...

Candidate: I'M THE BEST CHOICE FOR THIS STUDENT BODY! I KNOW WHAT YOU WANT!

Student: What I want is to get to class so the professor doesn't lock me out.

Candidate: BUT YOU'RE GOING TO VOTE TODAY, RIGHT?! AND FOR ME, RIGHT?! I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO UNDERSTANDS YOOOOOOOOOOU!

Student: Please stop touching me.

I'm only exaggerating a tad.

2. Passover

Some people dislike Yom Kippur, some despise Purim, others shudder at the thought of Simchat Torah.

I hate Passover.

I hate the length of the seder. I hate the endless chicken dinners. I hate "Kosher for Passover" cookies.

And the matzah! THE MATZAH! I can scramble it in eggs, drench it in olive oil, smother it in cream cheese and jelly, assemble mini-matzah pizzas, and fry little toasted cheese sandwiches, but it still tastes like a dry wad of disgusting.

I'm sure if the Israelites had realized that they were going to be subjected to a week of matzah for years on end, they would have stayed in Egypt.

Conclusion

Writing teachers always say that you need to tie everything together at the end of an essay in order to finish a work. It seems real life has already done it for me. Ready for this?

SGA candidates were serving cupcakes today.

Hatred for elections and Passover solidified. Can't make this stuff up, folks.

K.

2 comments:

  1. Ilene Kramer7:06 AM

    Kate, I love reading your blog. This was a hysterical entry... and even though I love Passover (it's my favorite holiday, i hope we can still be friends) there's nothing more annoying than delicious, free, chamutz snacks that we can't eat :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Aww, Ilene, we can still be friends! After all, I've tolerated your love of country music, why can't I handle this? :)

    K.

    PS. I haven't forgotten you. I have a card waiting to be sent out.

    ReplyDelete